The professor addressed his audience of final-year grad students.
“Time travel is real. We are all time travellers of one sort or another. The majority of the population are on a one-way voyage into the future, a voyage from which there is no coming back, But a few, usually members of an institution such as this great university, are time travellers of a different sort. They can be split into two classes: those who know that they are, and those who don’t.
“Those who know, such as myself, have actually experienced temporal displacement themselves. Those who don’t know, and there are a number of you here today, are those yet to travel through time. I know who you are because I’ve already transported you to the future in my time machine. We will be having a field trip sometime next week to prove this hypothesis. I have already been to the middle of next week from where I completed my first successful experiment and travelled forward one year.
“Unfortunately, my first foray into the past was less fortunate, and resulted in the destruction of a vital component. I’m lucky that I didn’t try to go any further back in time otherwise it would have been impossible to manufacture a replacement as the technology wouldn’t have existed. This component will be ready by Tuesday or Wednesday, in time for some of you to accompany me on that field trip and, in doing so, become time travellers of the third kind.
“It’s early days in the history of time travel and teething problems can be expected. I can assure you though, that in the future, you will be able to purchase a secondhand time machine, secure in the knowledge that they don’t make them like they’re going to anymore.”
Written in response to the Microcosms 300 word competition number 146 with reference to the prompt: Intellectual; Time Machine; Comedy